The Many Mysteries of Motherhood

There are a few things about my family that leave me shaking my head in astonishment and wonder on a daily basis. Allow me to share:


*  How is it possible that “there’s nothing to do” at this house. We have three kids’ bedrooms AND a
    playroom filled to the brim with toys and activities. Let’s Google what the kids in Haiti, Malawi, or 
    Ethiopia do for fun, shall we? That ought to make you kids feel spoiled (and guilty).

*  Where do all the spoons go in this house?!? Seriously. We have reached a critical spoon
    shortage here. How does that even happen?

*  How can they completely block me out, yet become entirely transfixed by this kid? His voice is 
    like nails on a chalkboard…certainly MINE is not. 

*  Why does my 6 year old son devour brussel sprouts…but refuse to eat my junk food hot dish?

*  Why won’t my 3 year old daughter let my husband read to her at night?  Last I checked
     my husband had two college degrees,which must mean that he’s perfectly literate. Why do I
     have to be the one to read ‘Rapunzel’s Magical Hair’ for the 7 bazillionth time?

*  Why do they always have to pick family picture day to act like complete animals? If I was being
    100% honest with the world, our Christmas card photo would look like this:

Thankfully our photographer always manages to save us by capturing 
the ONE millisecond when we look like this:

*  When exactly do they plan their conspiracy to keep us from sleeping in on weekends? 6:23
     is NOT an acceptable wake-up time on a Saturday morning. Go Back To Bed!  
*  What is it with Pokemon, anyway? My 8 year old is obsessed! I shutter every time he starts in 
     on that creepy jargon. “Did you know that Resheram evolves into Embor?” He’s tried convincing 
     me it’s educational because “adding up the powers involves math.” Whatever.  My new rule is if 
     you want Pokemon cards…buy them yourself. I can’t fund what I don’t understand.
*  Where do the summers go? Last spring I started a running list of all the fun things we were 
    going to do this summer. Now we’re just a few weeks away from school starting again and 
    we’ve probably managed to do 1/3 of what I had planned. *sigh* Time really does fly. 

I guess it’s time for me to start honing my super-sleuth skills in hopes of one day solving these mysteries of motherhood. Until then…any insight you all can offer me is welcome. 




Comments

  1. This Is such a great post!!!!! Graham is obsessed with Pokemon thanks to the bus!!!! And spreads this disease to any child in ear shot!!!! Lol! Thanks for the laughs!

    • Thanks Grace. Graham too? Thanks a lot, bus! I truly fear that Ben will be one of those 20 somethings who never let go of his love of Pokemon…living in our basement…without a significant other.

  2. Love this, I have managed to avoid Caillou and Barnie in our house. Can’t stand either. My son is a lego freak right now it is all I hear about and sometimes I o just want to scream!!

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